I lamented about how I have spent 2 years in France without picking up any useful phrases. Then one day out of the blue voila! my fellow french intern Cedric sent me the following email.
"Ok guys, now you should learn a few basics in the underground french language called "Argot". I hope you'll enjoy it ;)
so let's start with the very basic words:
-une femme (a woman): belette, gonzesse, greluche, grognasse, meuf, nana, gazelle, ...
-faire l'amour (having sex): baiser, niquer, sauter, forniquer, troncher, tringler, limer, fourrer, ...
-les testicules (man's balls): couilles, burnes, boules, pruneaux d'Agen (Agen's prunes : Agen is a city, very famous for prunes that grow there), bijoux de famille (family's jewelry), roubignolles, valseuses, coucougnettes,...
-l'anus (anus): fion, oignon (onion), rondelle (slice), trou de balle (bullet's hole)
but the most funny thing in french are probably the expressions:
1) Egoutter le colosse (to drain the colossus) : to jack off
2) Faire pleurer le cyclope (to make the cyclop crying) : to jack off
3) Se secouer le poireau (to shake the leek) : to jack off
4) Se branler : to jack off
5) La branlette : the jacking off activity, but it is also used to say that an activity you're doing is very relax/lazy (working here, it's la branlette) ^^
6) Se toucher la bite (to touch oneself dick) : to jack off, but also used to say "I'm lazy lah" (in french : je me touche la bite!)
7) Rouler une pelle (to roll a shovel) : to snog
8) Ca me troue le cul (it makes a hole in my ass) : used to say "this is astonishing/incredible/..."
9) Chier dans la colle (to shit in the glue) : to exaggerate, to go too far
10) Enculer les mouches (to fuck flies in the ass) : discussing interminably on details without a point (Uncle encule les mouches)
11) Chier a la gueule/Chier dans la bouche (to poop on someone's face/in someone's mouth) : to criticize someone (very) badly
12) Pourrir quelqu'un (to cause someone to rot) : to critisize someone (very) badly
13) Avoir les dents du fond qui baignent (having back teeth bathing) : having drunk too much --> being drunk
14) Peter la rondelle (to break to slice) : to sodomize
15) Tailler une pipe (to carve a pipe (the one for smoking)) : to suck off, to do a blowjob
16) Pomper le jus (to pump the juice up) : to suck off and swallow
17) Brouter le gazon (to graze the lawn) : doing a cunnilingus
18) Couler un bronze (to cast a bronze) : to shit
19) Demouler un cake (to turn out a cake) : to shit
20) Je m'en bas les couilles (I hit my balls) : I don't give a shit
21) Une couille dans le potage (a testicle in the soup) : a problem, a difficulty
22) Etre encore dans les couilles de son pere (still remaining in our own dad's balls) : not born yet
23) Avoir la tete dans le cul (having the head in the ass) : being tired or very sleepy
24) Avoir le cul borde de nouilles (having the ass filled with noodles) : being very lucky
25) Se sortir les doigts du cul (to put our fingers out of our ass) : making efforts
26) Taper dans la lune (to hit the moon) : to sodomize
27) Va te faire mettre chez les grecs (go get sodomized by the greeks) : fuck you! (greeks have the reputation to be gay, because of Antiquity stories)
28) Se tripoter la nouille (to twidle the noodle) : to jack off
29) Pisser a la raie (to pee in someone's butt crack) : to critisize someone..
30) Pisser dans un violon (to pee in a violin) : saying things that no one care about (Uncle pisse dans un violon)
There are many many others that are almost not translatable!
I hope you enjoyed ;) "
Thanks Cedric its a damn long list.
have a safe trip back to France! Bon voyage!
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