cambodia

Here are the pictures for Cambodia. Let you decide for yourself if my carrying about the freaking heaving camera bag was worth it.

"Flight of the Phoenix over Mekong"-cj

"streaks of gold"-cj

"Angkor Wat."-cj

"faces of Bayon (Angkor Thom)"-cj

"statues"-cj

"Banteay Srei - the red sandstone temple"-cj

how? your verdict.

early morning

I woke up at 6am this morning. I'm not sure how and I'm not sure why. Sleep has been eluding me lately. Something's bugging me, but I am not able to put a finger to it. sigh..

since i'm up, might as well go run now. fresh air.

europe according to..

Mapping stereotypes was a project by alphadesigner. As he has said, this is a geography of prejudices. Mr. Tsvetkov created the first one in 2009 during the time of the European energy crisis. It amuses his friends so much got this project rolling.

"bank"-cj

"Europe according to gay"-cj

You will be seeing more and more MEH. It is simply an expression of apathy, indifference or boredom. I think its the french equivalent will be "n'importe quoi".

"Europe according to USA"-cj

"Europe according to Britain"-cj

"Europe according to Italy"-cj

Haha Bruni Empire. For those of you who do not know. Carla Bruni is the Italian born wife of the French President. She is a song writer-singer and a former model.

"Europe according to Germany"-cj

"Europe according to France."-cj

don't you just love the multiple identities of Europe.

home

Boys and girls, I'm back. A few days without technology and i find myself withering in withdrawal. Woo! typing feels so good. I'm starting to think that fast typing is like a drug to developers. Without it your hands itch from withdrawal, too much of it your hands shake.

but it does feels good when you know you are not contactable.

bayon

"faces of bayon"-cj

my favorite Angkor temple

trip update

3 days passed and it felt like a week had gone by already. damn hot.. I'm looking forward to tomorrow.

To Angkor Wat and beyond!!

in cambodia

3 memory cards. 2 cameras. 3 batteries. I'm loaded and ready to charge in as Tomb Raider. RAWR!! By the time any of you read this, I've probably touched down and hit the ground shooting. RAWR!!

click. click. click. click. click.

bath

It's been a while since I had to wake up to bathe at 4 plus in the morning. This was exactly how it felt like after finishing the 2 to 4am guard duty shift..

didn't manage to catch up sleep. too much thinking.

bon courage

Few years later,
the plot was lost,
convoluted intricacies
hid the main cause.

Gone were the sweetness,
the lingering taste.
but love's more wholesome
it's not just a mere passing phase.

It's hard to forgive,
as we are no saint.
But time would soon heal
the slow burning pain.

Years from now
you will look back with fondness.
only the good memories -
the moments of shared happiness.

Cast aside
the scars and trepidation,
Move forward
again with youthful anticipation.

Embrace the world
with the bravery of a child.
The world will lead you again
with a hint, perhaps, mild.

-cj
Sept 16, 2010

a dedication

study

Shit man. I better finish Book 1 before I leave for Cambodia this weekend.

Mug mug.

ache

Why do I suddenly feel this wrenching discomfort?

[update]
I know now. It's the same wretched feeling I felt years ago. This time I am only going to offer so much.

counting down

Today is already Day 10 of Lost-in-Transition. 10 days since I finished my thesis and presentation slides, 309 till I officially start working. I can do this! I can watch at least 3000 more episodes of anime, refresh Facebook and Gmail 300 millions times, go for 40 1-week holidays, read 300 over books and run 15000km. Come to think of it these things comes with an opportunity cost of >20k of lost income. Maybe I am not so wise after all. If you want to know, I am not actually going to exclusively do all those mentioned above. I will probably look for part time work, doing delivery, filing and photocopying papers, do data entry, maybe some basic web development and going for job interviews. I am also considering doing social work for 6months. No work is beneath me.

Considering going to Mauritius with NUS.

Or maybe join WWOOF.

10 down! 309 more days to go!

ties

The threads that ties our lives together are sometimes so thin that you do not see them. Everyone goes around thinking they are leading their own lives. But the threads' existence is undeniable as they are still able to tug at your heart strings whenever something happens to someone around you.

hope things work out for you.

rise & shine

I woke up at 930 a.m. and there's everyone has left home already. Guess I'm the laziest one in the family.

carbo loading breakfast! itadakimasu

happiness

I know some of you out there reading this blog are perpetually unhappy. If your unhappiness do not stem from situational problems, my offering a listening ear probably wont help much. There is only so much sympathy can do for someone. I can be more useful if you allow me to try and fix your problems instead of just listening; I'm a problem solving ENGINEER. But if you need a listening ear, I'm always just a ring away. So how to make yourself happier? I found an article '5 things that will make you happy' for you guys to digest.

1. Be grateful – Some study participants were asked to write letters of gratitude to people who had helped them in some way. The study found that these people reported a lasting increase in happiness – over weeks and even months – after implementing the habit. What's even more surprising: Sending the letter is not necessary. Even when people wrote letters but never delivered them to the addressee, they still reported feeling better afterwards.

2. Be optimistic – Another practice that seems to help is optimistic thinking. Study participants were asked to visualize an ideal future – for example, living with a loving and supportive partner, or finding a job that was fulfilling – and describe the image in a journal entry. After doing this for a few weeks, these people too reported increased feelings of well-being.

3. Count your blessings – People who practice writing down three good things that have happened to them every week show significant boosts in happiness, studies have found. It seems the act of focusing on the positive helps people remember reasons to be glad.

4. Use your strengths – Another study asked people to identify their greatest strengths, and then to try to use these strengths in new ways. For example, someone who says they have a good sense of humor could try telling jokes to lighten up business meetings or cheer up sad friends. This habit, too, seems to heighten happiness.

5. Commit acts of kindness – It turns out helping others also helps ourselves. People who donate time or money to charity, or who altruistically assist people in need, report improvements in their own happiness.

I can say that perhaps 2 to 4 do help. They kinda explain why I am so happy now.

Unhappiness

So while we are still at this topic (geez I found a lot of interesting related articles), here are 7 thoughts that are bad for you.

1. cynicism (I can say for sure I'm no longer that cynical kid I was before I left for France)
2. lack of meaning (I do enjoy the small pockets of meaninglessness in my life.. so I do not agree with this)
3. fretting (I don't fret a lot)
4. lack of self control (Well... perhaps once a blue moon)
5. anxiety (Perhaps about my parent's well being)
6. gloom and doom (I am not even close)
7. stress (Hmm.. what's that?)

triple chin smile :DDD

$75,000

I saw an article on wall street journal (Sept 7,2010).The title was catchy enough,'The perfect salary for happiness: $75,000'. The first thing that came to my mind was, "Damn, someone raised the bar." The last article I read on mymoneyblog.com (May 26, 2010) quoted $60,000 as the special number for happiness. Curiously, both of them cited behavioral economist/ psychologist Daniel Kahneman in their article. Here is his TED talk. So was U.S. hit by a 25% inflation over the past 3 months or did expectations changed drastically within a span of 3 months? I am no behavioral economist and I am not bother enough to formulate a working proposition here myself. Either way 60K or 75K, my allowance is a measley 18k per annum. I am not even halfway there yet.

So if anyone of you can figure this out, message me.

employed

I've signed on the dotted line. I'm entitled to 21 days leave wor..

beat that.

no discipline

I went to school in the evening today with the intention of attending class. Instead, the moment I sat down in my cubicle I started watching Naruto until now. I have skipped the class I came all the way to school for. Crap. If I had known I am going to end up watching anime, I could have done that at home. Also, I had resolved to start studying today. That did not turn out too well either. Neither did I manage to wake up early to run this morning.

no self discipline. crap. =\

morning activities

Why is 小胖 kicking a deflated foot ball around in the basketball court alone on a Monday morning? Is it school holidays already?

maybe i should go down and kick around with him..

naruto

Now that the thesis and the seminar slides are all done, there is no good reason to go to school. It is not that I go to school everyday anyway, but now I have officially nothing else to do for my degree. Finding things to do over the weekends is easy, finding things to do everyday is difficult. I began watching Naruto.

Time is like a shinobi that has the genjutsu to change its size. An S-Rank Jonin in the Bingo Book, Time is extremely elusive at times and exceptionally hard to kill. Recently, it has been growing in size. I was only with the help of Naruto, I was able to find renewed strength to kill time. Well, I am at Episode 80 now and there's another few hundred episodes more to go. After this, I will probably start watching Bleach.

Time always manages to free itself.

meanings change

Different abbreviations meant different things at different point of our lives. I was arranging to meet a friend for dinner when she said,"Let's meet at JP for dinner." It took a while before I manage to rationalize what JP stands for in her context. Times have changed.

MS no longer stands for Microsoft
JP no longer stands for Jurong Point
CS no longer stands for Counter Strike
DB no longer stands for Detention Barracks

maybe it's just me and my obsession?

catchy

what an ironic match of angry words and happy tune.

books

UPS just dropped a box of books at my doorsteps. Guess I will be able to occupy myself till Dec.

time to hit the books.

repeat

.. it is ok to be not doing anything for 6 months..
.. it is ok to be not doing anything for 6 months..
.. it is ok to be not doing anything for 6 months..
.. it is ok to be not doing anything for 6 months..
.. it is ok to be not doing anything for 6 months..
.. it is ok to be not doing anything for 6 months..

.
.
.
.. it is ok to be not doing anything for 6 months..

easier said than done.

2am

Sleep had not been able to catch up with Time lately. I find myself awake at odd hours (like now) not doing anything productive. Ever since I got the job offer, half of my drive got swallowed by complacency. The other half got chewed into bits today when I threw the Ph.D thought out of the window. The idea had been floated back and forth for a few months now. After the conversation with my supervisor, I am determined. Took me long enough to realize that he does not give a crap about me. It was pretty disappointing to know that he let me off in a year (I am grateful for that) not becasue he felt that publishing 3 papers in a year was enough. Rather, I, a Masters student is taking up one slot of his quota for his phd students' head count. Blah.

No loss. I got 4 free months ahead of me. I can continue to look for work.