forking etiquette

I was reading Scott Adams Blog when I realized that fine dining eludes a lot of my peers. I find myself correcting people when they hold the fork with their right hand. It is hard not to notice when they sit across you and they mirror you. I have Ms T. Ng to thank for the fine dining classes during Home Economics lessons in VS. (Yes I did Home Economics, but I will talk about that another time. It's an animal of a subject in itself. Imagine me with a sewing machine.)

quote

My wife and I were eating lunch during our holiday vacation, and she asked me, in a suspiciously casual tone of voice, if I were aware of the proper etiquette for using a fork. I responded with a blank stare, which was my way of saying that her yammering was distracting me from shoveling a respectable percentage of the resort's entire buffet from my plate into my maw.

Undaunted, Shelly went on to demonstrate her point, holding a knife in her right hand, and a fork in her left hand with the tines pointed inexplicably downward. Her index finger was on the back of each utensil, and she explained that you should continue holding the knife even while you're not sawing on a dead animal.

Against all odds, Shelly's words penetrated the fog of my feeding frenzy. As her explanation sunk in, I started to go into traumatic etiquette shock. That's the feeling you get when you realize that for several decades people have watched you eat and probably compared you unfavorably to a stoned raccoon on garbage day.

The world started moving in slow motion as I looked around the dining room to verify this stunning revelation. Sure enough, every adult diner was using the method Shelly described. How could I have gone my entire life without noticing? I was shocked and ashamed.

I quickly tried to imitate the proper forking method. That turned out to be problematic because I'm a vegetarian. I didn't have anything on my plate that needed cutting, and the upside down fork method was a disaster for eating rice. I could only balance a few grains at a time on the back of my fork, and half of those ended up on my lap, where I have been told a napkin should have been.

I knew there was something missing in Shelly's explanation of proper fork use, but she wasn't giving me any more clues. The other diners all seemed to be eating meat; they were no help. I briefly considered a catapult solution, which would have involved pushing some rice onto the back of the fork, glancing furtively around the room to make sure no one was looking, and launching the payload toward my face. That probably sounds stupid to you, but keep in mind that I had already bought into the notion of using a fork upside down. I couldn't rule out anything.

I was determined to fork properly from this moment on, and not add to a lifetime of humiliation. It took me an hour to finish my rice, averaging three grains per fork. The buffet had soup, but I couldn't imagine how long it would take to consume it with my spoon turned upside down, or backwards, or using just the edge; Shelly hadn't covered spoon etiquette, so I was mostly guessing.

By the end of the meal I was still wondering if this whole episode had been an elaborate practical joke, with everyone else in on it. I pulled out my iPhone and Googled "fork etiquette." A dried branch of a lady with an upper class accent appeared on video demonstrating the technique Shelly had described. My mortification was complete.

In my defense, I grew up in a small town, in a farming environment. We valued efficiency over ritual. Inefficiency was synonymous with stupidity. If there had been a way to eat faster by somehow involving your ass cheeks, that's how I would have learned to do it. If someone sneezed where I grew up, there was no reason to say "God Bless you," because either God was already handling it or he didn't exist. God didn't need a middle man to handle a simple sneezing transaction.

Anyway, back to my story, I was horrified and humiliated by my lack of forking knowledge. I started to panic, wondering what other rules of etiquette had somehow escaped my notice. Was I supposed to open doors using nothing but my elbows? Should I dial my phone with a single knuckle? Should I salute anyone wearing a hat and ask, "How's the war going, Captain?" My point is that there's no way to deduce etiquette from logic.

Recently I did more research and discovered that Shelly's forking technique is called the Continental method. It's the method used in Europe as well as anywhere else that the British have killed the locals. I also learned that you're allowed to turn your fork right-side-up for scooping anything can't be stabbed. Fair enough.

Best of all, there is an American forking method too, and that is what I had always used. That involves holding the fork in your right hand, like a pen, with the tines pointing up. But I have been informed that cutting food with the edge of my fork is bad form, no matter how efficient it is. Bah! I reject that tyranny.

Last night at a local restaurant I observed a boy, about ten years old, at a nearby table who took the principle of dining efficiency to such a high level that I wept tears of admiration. The restaurant provided a fork and spoon rolled up in a paper napkin. They expect you to break the paper seal and free the utensils from the napkin. But the boy realized he could use the entire sealed unit as a fork-spoon with a napkin surround. He would grab the entire bundle, stab some food with the fork and wipe his mouth on the wrapped bundle. I don't use the "genius" label too often, but I think it applies in this case, even though he was just kidding around. I believe I witnessed the invention of the napkinforkspoon. And someday, God willing, when efficiency replaces etiquette, we will all be using it.

unquote

haha fork it. kopitiam have no rules.

AAR

Here is a recap of my 2010 resolutions.

1) Get employed by the end of the year and be able to say I love my job. (I have an offer at hand and I love the company) Done!

2) Be back home for dinner with my parents more often. (Well since my research can be done from home, I am at home most of the time this year.) Done!

3) Show more concern towards those that mattered. Revive a good friendship that I once had and still cherish a lot. (Well won't talk about this) Done!

4) Run Standchart marathon; all 42.125km of it under 5 1/2hours. (Even though I had a valid reason. I had Level 1 exams that day. Ultimately, the point is I wanted to start running again and I did not train for it at all.) Fail!

5) Graduate. (Well I have cleared most of the requirements. I'm deciding when I want to graduate.) Done!

well at least I got most of them down.

somewhere

Somewhere deep down inside, I have already made up my mind. If this is how it is going to turn out, then it is how it will be. Quoi qu’il puisse se passer, je l’assume.

advienne que pourra.

sounds of rain

I was sitting beside the window when it began to rain. 'ting ting ting'. I watched the rain drops landing resonantly on the aluminum sill. Other less fortunate droplets landed directly on the vertically edge and were sliced into two; they went without a sound. On the window sill was an orchestra of glass bottles balanced precariously; some were upright others were upside down. Droplets that landed on them gave out a different but clearer 'ding ding ding'. The collective chime was magically musical.

The rain then got heavier and the bad weather orchestra picked up its rhythms and intensity. There was no need to shift myself as I was safely seated clear of the direct and ricocheting water pellets. The symphony reached a climax when the small rapid trickling of water from overhanging edges quickly coalesce into a bigger drop before falling into the puddle below. They angrily worked up the base of the set with regular 'thud thud thud'.

As the rain drew closer its end, the peacefulness of the sounds were restored. I looked up at the sky and was disappointed not so see any rainbow. Before you question my musicians' acumen or marvel at my hidden musicality, I have to admit that this was not the first thing that came to my mind when I heard the rain. The first thing that popped up into my mind was...

... if I time the intervals of each 'ting' or 'ding' will I find a hidden Fibonacci series?

soldiers' dialog

If you had played Plants vs Zombies, maybe you will enjoy this dialogue I found on Dorkly.com: Plant vs Zombies vs. Awesome.

Peashooter :Ah, life. Fresh air, warm sunlight, and plenty of water, garden life is great.
Repeater: Bunker-up soldier, welcome to hell.
Peashooter: What are you talking about?
Repeater: You’ve just been planted into a battlefield.
Peashooter: A battlefield? But the sunflowers look like they’re having such a great time.
Repeater: Their smiles are just for show. They have it rough.
Sunflower: BLARGH!! Oh God make it stop!
Peashooter: Did he just vomit sunshine?
Sunflower: Please, someone cut off my stalk. Tear me up. Do anything, just don’t… oh no it’s coming again! BLARGH!!
Peashooter: Can’t someone help him?
Repeater: Would love to, but we need his sunshine.
Peashooter: For photosynthesis?
Repeater: You’d think so, but we actually use as currency to purchase biological weapons against the zombie onslaught. Oh great, here comes another rookie.
Wall-nut: Yeah! Frontline! Someone hand me my nut-shooter.
Peashooter: So we shoot seeds at the zombies?
Repeater: Yeah, well… not Wall-nut. He is more of a sacrificial plant.
Wall-nut: Sacrificial? Wait, come on guys. Hand me my weapon, this zombie is wicked close.
Repeater: Sorry buddy, take it like a champ!
Wall-nut: OH MY GOD! MY SHELL! I FEEL EVERYTHING!
Repeater: You’re doing great! Keep it up!
Wall-nut: I DON’T HAVE ARMS TO PROTECT MYSELF!
Sunflower: BLARGH!! Kill me now!
Peashooter: This place is awful.
Repeater: What did I tell you? And that’s not even the worst of it.
Peashooter: How could it get worse than this?
Repeater: Our weapon supplier has a mental disorder.
Crazy Dave: I’M CRAAAAAAAZY!
Peashooter: How can you tell?
Repeater: First of all, he’s using garden plants as weapons against the zombie apocalypse. But the pot-helmet is a dead giveaway. Plus, he’s always reaffirming that’s he’s crazy.
Peashooter: Why does he do that?
Crazy Dave: BECAUSE I’M CRAAAAAAAZY!
Repeater: Told ya.
Peashooter: So… we’re all going to die.
Repeater: Pretty much.
Crazy Dave: Hold up little saplings, eventually the zombies will give up and we will all have a massive dance party!
Repeater: …
Peashooter: Yeah, we’re f—ked.

Me: now that I am the commander in chief, we are going to swamp the 60 levels of zombies effortlessly.

60th

The 60th post this month!

Well, it's kind of a record.

kindness

I have been reading a lot lately (and I see a direct correlation between the frequency of blog posts and the amount of things I read). The latest book that graced my hands now is Liar's Poker. It provided an unflattering portrayal of Wall Street, the people working there and their perceived exclusivity and disrespect for anything non monetary. If what I read in this book and in the wall street forums are true, then won't getting the 'top job' become a constant struggle to withhold kindness. It sounded like closing a sale where you trade in your kindness for prestige and pledge allegiance to money. Is turning into a hard ass part of the job requirement? Maybe this is why I am half hoping to snatch the offer and half hoping to be rejected so that I do not have to make that decision for myself.

no matter how hard it is, i will still be kind. cos that is the only right thing to do.

competency test

That went well. Programming in Matlab is simply a piece of cake.

bring on the next round!

had enough

I had enough and I really mean it. I do not want the taste of vinegar to linger in my mouth, to keep eying the conveyor belt for salmon skins, to see sushi rice balls stacked up into x'mas trees and to drink diluted green tea refilled a hundred times. Especially, not after today.

no more Japanese food till after cny please.

snails evolved

Maybe I did not know enough when I posted here questioning the evolutionary successes of snails. NatureNews: Left turns saves snails from snakes explained that "some species of Satsuma snail have shells that coil to the left, which probably evolved because the snakes that prey on them have jaws specialized for feeding on the molluscs' right-coiling ancestors".

I have a feeling next time when i see a snail, i will instinctively observe the direction of the coil

chocolate and coffee instead

We had chocolate and coffee instead of tea. Some things do not change after 3 years. You were still roughly an hour late and the reason for arriving late was still because of cell cultures. Same dress sense but that was not surprising since laboratory compliant dress code does not evolve with fashion. Maybe a slight gain in weight? But I was still able to recognize you at first sight and the manly gait is still there (hahaha sorry). The first few seconds still felt the same after all these years, but other things have changed. Conversations were still light and brisk punctuated with the occasional sarcasm or joke, but silence was no longer as comfortable. I guess like all things in the universe, friendship follows the law of inertia. When things begin to run again after being stalled for a while, there is the initial traction that needs to be overcome. Next time we meet up again, we need an activity to fill in the conversation lapse.

then we can move to gear 2 (:

awake

if only i know the reason why am i up at this hour.

text icons

I have seen a lot of text icons in my life :) ;p :-O o.O :D .This is the first time i see this new hybrid text icon :$. So if you are as ignorant as me, you can choose to believe its origination explained in the equation below or not.

:$ = :S + :|

my reply to her explanation ----> :$

tea

wow after 3+ years. Let's hope you still look like your outdated facebook profile pic..

the physics of christmas

Since most people who reads what I write does not believe in Santa Claus anyway, there is no harm in posting this a Christmas killer. After reading this, all I can say is Do not let your kids hang around physicists. So here is what I got from Jim's website : The Physics of Christmas. quote.

1) No known species of reindeer can fly, but there are 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified. While most of these are insects and germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule out flying reindeer which only Santa has ever seen.

2) There are 2 billion children in the world (persons under 18), but since Santa doesn't (appear) to handle Muslim, Hindu, Jewish, or Buddhist children, that reduces the workload by 85% of the total - leaving 378 million according to the Population Reference Bureau. At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that's 91.8 million homes. One presumes there is at least one good child per house.

3) Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different times zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 822.6 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with good children, Santa has 1/1000 th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, fill the stocking, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left, get back up the chimney, get back into the sleigh and move on to the next house. Assuming that each of these 91.8 million stops are evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but for the purposes of our calculations we will accept), we are now talking about .78 miles per household, a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting stops to do what most of us do at least once every 31 hours, plus feeding, etc. That means that Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second, 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle on earth, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second - a conventional reindeer can run, at tops, 15 miles per hour.

4) The payload on the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming each child get nothing more than a medium-sized Lego set (2 pounds), the sleigh is carrying 321,300 tons, not counting Santa, who is invariably described as overweight. On land, conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting the "flying reindeer" can pull TEN TIMES that normal amount, we cannot do the job with eight, or even nine. We need 214,200 reindeer. This increases payload - not even counting the weight of the sleigh to 353,430 tons. Again, for comparison, this is four times the weight of the _Queen Elizabeth_II.

5) 353,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance. This will heat the reindeer up in the same fashion as spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair will absorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of energy per second, each. In short, they will burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them, and creating a deafening sonic boom in their wake. The entire reindeer team will be vaporized in 4.26 thousandths of a second. Santa meanwhile, will be subject to centrifugal forces 17,500.06 times greater than gravity. A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by a 4,315,015 pound force. In conclusion, if Santa ever DID deliver presents of Christmas Eve, he's now dead.

unquote.

see what I mean

tofu burger

Maybe going to NEX (North East Exchange) on Christmas Day was a bad idea. Yea I know, you guys cannot believe that I actually bother to venture beyond my 10 km from home perimeter. Exactly, I was asking myself too 'why go to NEX when I have Vivo, Tiong Bahru Plaza, Great World, Cityhall, Marina, Suntec, Orchard, Chinatown, Sentosa in my backyard within 20min bus ride'. That was until I checked out the tenants in NEX. The number of restaurants, cafes, food kiosks and food courts there makes it a gastronomical heaven. I saw the lists (L1, L2, L3, L4) and it blew me away man. FOOD!! OMG SO MUCH FOOD!! There are exactly 99 eating outlets and you did not hear me wrong - 99. So even if I was not interested in the remaining 200+ stalls there, food was a compelling enough reason. Even the crowd was not going to stop me.

So that was where I first stepped into Freshness Burger. The outlet at NEX was its first and at this moment only outlet in Singapore. I only found out it was a Japanese food chain after I googled it when I got home. I felt robbed when I had to pay 11 for a burger meal (maybe it was wrong have MacDonald's burger meals as anchor prices), so I had to check it out. It was there where I saw Tofu Burger (see picture below). Yea, I am serious Tofu Burger. I thought to myself, is it going to go out of shape after the first bite. It did not. It is not burger manna, but it tasted decent. If you like to eat burgers and eat healthy at the same time, try this.

"tofu burger"-cj

NEX is just too crowded.

chickens

They were not exactly what I had expected as Christmas presents. But truthfully, they are starting to glow on me now. Simple gifts are more meaningful.

i will let them sit beside my camera.

hosted on the patio

The gem of a restaurant is hidden in the midst of empty office buildings. The empty car parks and a semi obstructed view of AYE was the last place I would expect to find restaurant with al fresco dining. The off city location gave Hosted the luxury of space. There was no need to squeeze as many tables into the restaurants as possible to cover the rent. The indoor dining deco was clean, white, spacious and simple; almost Ikea style. The al fresco dining area was furnished with comfortable sofas and wooden wine barrels. It almost felt like home. The lead singer of the live band set the mood for people who wants to enjoy the surroundings and indulge in music. She belted out numbers in her wholesome voice, while entertaining dedications.

The food was served at comfortable intervals as I was able to talk and dine for an enjoyable 3hrs. The 5 course dinner was like a trip back to Europe. Their "Italian Aborio Rice Simmered with array of Seafood and Spicy Chorizo in a Light Saffron Tomato Broth" has an uncanny similarity to Spanish paella. I enjoyed every one of the dishes served so much I ate them in small morsels, savouring every bite and hoping to make the meal last as long as possible. The other dishes on the menu "Caramelized Onion in Beef Broth with Parmesan Toast", "Vodka and Sea Salt Cured Black Cod on Pickled Japanese Cucumber, Wasabi Foam and Tobiko Roe", "Lightly Poached in Red Wine and Pan Fried Grass Fed Sirloin on Braised Root Vegetables", "Slow Roasted Turkey Breast on Chestnut, Mushroom and Apricot Stuffing and Cranberry Glaze" and "Medallions of Soft Sponge Rolled with Mixed Dried Fruits and Glazed in Bitter Chocolate served with Orange Cream and Summer Berries" were equally delicious. If i were in Italy, I would have done the hand gesture for magnifico. Rolled my right hand into an OK sign, kissed my thumb and index finger and send the "muack" to the rest of the world with a outflick of the wrist. semplicemente delizioso!

[disclaimer: you might not feel the same way. I was in extremely good mood. so every thing's good]

Hosted. I will give three thumbs up.

merry x'mas

i guess tonight went well.

high tech vs low tech

"hacking :O"-cj

thought it was a pretty fun clip to watch.

x'mas cheer

Let Google show you how to spread some X'mas cheer around. Google voice allows you to send a personalize call from Santa using sendacallfromsanta. I have tried it, but none of my friends bother to reply to it. So I guess it is not impactful enough. Sorry guys, this year there will be no x'mas cards. I am running tight on budget due to cash outflow to my two left feet. No love lost I hope. (: If you are waiting for Santa to drop by, you can follow him on NORAD Santa Tracker. If you and I remembered correctly, this same tracker showed that he DID NOT drop by Singapore last year. Let's hope he make it up to us this year. Btw, the countdown on the website does not follow Singapore's time. At the time this post is written the countdown is 13hr 40min. So if you are in Singapore please tune in earlier tomorrow to track Santa. So if he makes Singapore his first stop then won't he be flying in our air space at 3pm in the afternoon..

today is going to be a good day. (:

game makers..

"huh.."-cj

why am i not surprised..

question

why does a hedge fund ask for my national service role, position and status?

tailgate

I maintained a distance of approximately thirty meters from him. We were running against the traffic and the headlights of the on coming traffic was causing red flares to form in my eyes. I blinked to readjust my eyes to the darker surroundings instead of the glaring headlights. He was running at a pace that I could keep up with comfortably - my "talking" speed. This tailing him continued for a good 8 min.

Slightly in front of us, a bus stopped and a throngs of aunties alighted. I lost him in the crowd of people. When the crowd has dispersed, I have lost him. I scanned the surroundings and he was out of sight. Cladded in a bright yellow vest, he should not be hard to spot in the dark. He simply disappeared. I soldiered on without him until I reached an isolated stretch near the foot of Mt. Faber. I felt like there were eyes on me and I turned back. There he was pounding the leaves behind me. How long has he been there? Where did he come from? Why isn't he overtaking me?

I kept my pace until I reached back home. There I caught a clearer look of his face. He's the guy from the 15th floor.

yo neighbour. next time say hi.

read

I think I am a news junkie. I can just sit in front of my laptop and read the next news feed from my e-reader for the whole day.

not the forget the TED videos.

run

Running is like a drug. I have always thought that running clears out all the trash that accumulates in your brain; inviting you to stay in a house of nirvana. I was wrong. The brain makes use of neurofeedback to channel its attention towards the most immediate and acute source of pain (the discomfort of running). So what running actually does is to dump a bigger load of trash (pain) into your backyard, deceiving your brain and making you forget momentarily the smaller pile.

So is there a better way to manage pain?

Yes, at least I got the impression after reading My Pain, My Brain on NY Times. Now I know there is actually a pain modulation circuit. I will not summarize the whole text here. But I will include some of the author's revelations.

1. The basis: The pain-modulatory system is triggered by belief. The brain will shut down pain if it believes it has been given pain relief, even when it hasn't (the placebo effect), and it will augment pain if it believes you are being hurt, even if you aren't (the nocebo effect).

2. The methodology. During my next Decrease Pain interval, instead of trying to picture a vacation, I imagined myself as a martyr, lucidly reciting Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death while being burned at the stake. The pain remained quiet. Feel that sensation, but tell yourself that it is just a completely harmless, short-term tactile sensation. Pilgrims and devotees all around the world choose to inflict pain upon themselves during sacred rites — from being nailed to crosses to dangling from hooks. For them, pain is an occasion for euphoria, not dysphoria.

3. The rationale: This points shows that with training, pain can be controlled and regulated. "I believe the technique may make lasting changes because the brain is a machine designed to learn," deCharms says. The brain is soft-wired (plastic) rather than hard-wired: whenever you learn something new, new neural connections are believed to form and old, unused ones to wither away. (Researchers refer to this as activity-dependent neuroplasticity.) In other words, if you actively engage a certain brain region, you can alter it.

4. The Result: The results of the scan, Mackey showed me, revealed significant brain control. A week later, I was scanned again, this time in the offices of Omneuron. I could feel that it was easier to control my rACC with less reliance on elaborate fantasy; I was interacting more directly with my brain.

I could not agree less. I was feeling angry lately, but no longer because I have learned to believe in people.

quote

"maybe I'm just anal-ytical."

peak hour

Running at slightly past 8am is a bad idea. The number of cars and container trucks zipping around the bend downhill past you at >70km per hour during peak hour makes me worried that I would be sucked in by their drift if I were any lighter. That aside. You cannot help but take deep breathes when you run; sucking in a considerable amount of exhaust smoke emitted by the hundreds of vehicles on the road. The distance covered today was not impressive, but at least it was further that the day before. I think if I keep up at this, I am going to be ready for the sun down race.

i need to wake up earlier. Perhaps at 7am to run.

run

better sleep early tonight. Got to wake up early to run.

call him Doug

With is bugged eyes, crocked snout and teeth, he is dubbed Britain's ugliest dog. I do not know why but I find him cute. I can totally imagine him in some cartoon or comic strips being bullied by some fat evil cats, like how Odie is often bullied by Garfield. His "fantastic loving temperament" probably balance the scale and he is blessed with terribly good luck. If you read about him on icanhascheezburger.com, it is heartening to know that he found a good home.

"Doug."-cj

i wonder if he can walk straight

Google laptop

With the introduction of the new Google laptop, the CR-48 Chrome Notebook, I have a feeling that Google is planning to take over the world of Technology. At first there was only a Google search, then suddenly we have Gmail, Gtalk, Google translate, Google calender, Google Reader, Chrome, Chrome OS, Nexus Android phone and etc. etc. From hardware to soft wares, Google has a foot in every market pie. Thankfully, Facebook is doing a good job of keeping them out on the war front of social media; permanently taking out Google Wave.

The most distinctive mark about the Chrome notebook is that, there is NO CAPS BUTTON (caps pun intended). If you want to read more about the origination of the CAPS button, you can read it on Slate: Google's Decision to abandon CAPS lock. Basically, it originated from typewriters as there was a need to elevate and lock the carriage to type in caps. Since most of us do not type in CAPS anyway and with the introduction of the SHIFT button, it has made the CAPS Lock button redundant to most consumer. Before I heard people from Banking Operations scream in distress, there are ways to go about typing in caps instead of permanently holding the SHIFT button down with your pinkie; like for example configure your computer keyboard settings. So what is in place of the CAPS button now, is the super cool SEARCH button. See the magnifying glass below? I bet I am going to use it a lot, soon I might be hitting the SEARCH button as intuitively as hitting ENTER.

"see! no caps!"-cj

Do we call users ourselves Googlers, Googlets or Googlelites?

sore

This morning it was exceptionally hard to climb out of bed. I only remembered working out my legs yesterday, but my whole body's feeling sore. In the morning, there was the short 4km run. In the evening, there was the salsa double spin routine which worked out a relatively undeveloped part of the thigh muscle. The unequal muscular development on the left and right side of my body resulted a fine right spin and an unstable left spin. Practice makes perfect.

I can't wait for ballet classes to start. :D

word lens

With this cool new iphone apps, Word Lens, you no longer have to wonder about what the signboards says when you travel in non English speaking countries. It detects the word and does an automatic translation into English. It probably works the same way as Google Translate, but with the additional word recognition function. For all you iphone users out there, please download it and let me play with it.

"introducing word lens"-cj

i want an iphone too.

heroism

Ever heard of the story 武松打虎 (Wu Song kills Tiger) from Water Margin (one of Chinese literature classics)? 1000 years from now, people might talk about the tale of 'Dragan the Shark Killer' in ancient Egypt in B.C. 2010. Yesterday, a killer shark was killed after a Serbian tourist jumped barehanded into the sea. He passed to his friend his only weapon, a bottle of beer, and jumped off the jumping board into the sea where the shark of lurking. He killed the beast with a single strike. But if you talk about heroism, there was really really none to speak of. The Serbian touist was in a drunken stupor when he leaped off the jumping board to do a high dive. The poor shark who was struck squarely on its head was no more than an unfortunate victim of killer litter. Well so if you need any story of heroism for posterity sake, we can exaggerate this one here. It helps that his name (Dragan Stevic) sounds like Dragon, so we can scream on the headlines . Read more about it at geekologic and macedonia online. You can check its authenticity yourself.

"the victim"-cj

was wu song drunk too when the tiger was killed?

run

I woke up with so many angry things that I wanted to say, so I thought I should go for a run. Running is not made up of 1000 steps, it is a fluid motion. My body will relax and my mind will be still and focused. Running does two things to me mentally. First, it clears my head. Second, it instills composure and endurance. At the end of the run, all the angry words were all stamped not with a 忍, but with a 何必呢。

if it does not contribute to betterment, it is better left unsaid x 100

plant vs zombie

After completing the game, I cannot help but want to play their MV again (part of the chorus actually sounded like "I want it that way" by BSB). It's has been a pretty amusing 60 levels. It requires a bit of strategy, speed and coordination; I would still classify it as entertaining and mindless fun. It sure helped to kill many boring afternoons.

"sunflower concert =.="-cj

There’s a zombie on your lawn
There’s a zombie on your lawn
There’s a zombie on your lawn
We don’t want zombies on the lawn

I know your type: tall, dark, and dead
You want to bite all the petals off of my head
And then eat the brains of
the one who planted me here

I’m just a sunflower but see
me power an entire infantry
You like the taste of brains
we don’t like zombies

I used to play football
Road cones protect my head
I have a screen-door shield
We are the undead

Maybe it’s time to reevaluate
I know you have a lot of food on your plate
Brains are quite rich in cholesterol

You’re dead so it doesn’t matter,
Instead we’ll use this solar power
to make a lawn defense at any hour

I like the tricycle
There’s butter on my head
I’m gonna eat your brains

"There’s a zombie on your lawn (in Japanese: Uraniwa ni Zombies ga!)

by Laura Shigihara"

i need 50 more sunshine!

cured of HIV

Wow. If it is something this amazing, how come its not on the front cover of broadsheets yet? Read it on Gizmodo : Man Officially Cured of HIV.

what's the odds of catching both HIV and leukemia at the same time?

tacit

If it does not create any betterment, it is best left unsaid.

last min

last minute arrangements, now I cannot go out for a ride.. :(

quote

"De·cem·ber [di-sem-ber] –noun: Less work, More parties."

- Ms Xie

incriminatory

I would convene a private session for consult whenever I am in a dilemma. My friends playing the role of the independent jury and prosecutor and I would double up as both the plaintiff and the defendant (this sounds like I am lodging a complaint against myself..). The defendant is Benefit-of-e-Doubt who is 26 years old and the plaintiff is Reason who 19yrs old (according to canon law. hahaha pls excuse my sense of humor).

The friendly prosecutor would challenge my objectivity, question for specifics and then we would bounce theories off each other. Though Reason have a pretty solid case for his working theory and the prosecutor would usually agree that the motivation and actions are consistent with the theory, Benefit-of-e-Doubt always wins over the jury and the verdict.

When reason lose, i can only try my best to reconcile with myself..

Filmography 2010

Filmography 2010 is a montage of the movies in theaters for the year 2010. The 'seamless' editing smoothly combined the visuals, the music and the dialogues into one spectacular movie flashback experience. Let's see how many can you recognize. If you want to know the films used and how is it being done, hear it straight from the creator at SlashFilm.

"if you want something you have got to fight for it."-cj

that was the one phrase I picked out.

walls

it gets tiring..

50 dev quotes

For future developers, here is a compilation of 50 programming quotes from TechSource. You can go and read them all yourself, but I will highlight some of those I found more interesting. If you only have time for 3 quotes read 4, 5, 44 and 50.

50. "Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the universe trying to build bigger and better idiots. So far, the universe is winning." - Rick Cook

48. "Walking on water and developing software from a specification are easy if both are frozen." - Edward V Berard

44. "I have always wished for my computer to be as easy to use as my telephone; my wish has come true because I can no longer figure out how to use my telephone." - Bjarne Stroustrup

39. “Considering the current sad state of our computer programs, software development is clearly still a black art, and cannot yet be called an engineering discipline.” - Bill Clinton

25. “You can’t have great software without a great team, and most software teams behave like dysfunctional families.” - Jim McCarthy

24. "PHP is a minor evil perpetrated and created by incompetent amateurs, whereas Perl is a great and insidious evil, perpetrated by skilled but perverted professionals." - Jon Ribbens

23. "Programming is like kicking yourself in the face, sooner or later your nose will bleed." - Kyle Woodbury

10. "People think that computer science is the art of geniuses but the actual reality is the opposite, just many people doing things that build on each other, like a wall of mini stones." - Donald Knuth

5. “To iterate is human, to recurse divine.” - L. Peter Deutsch

4. "On two occasions I have been asked [by members of Parliament]: 'Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the right answers come out?' I am not able rightly to apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question." - Charles Babbage

1. “There are two ways of constructing a software design. One way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies. And the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies.” - C.A.R. Hoare

forgot to mention, we can't count too. we need to write a program on Matlab to do that.

Zeitgeist

With 2010 coming to an end, we can take a look at Singaporean top searches on Google: Zeitgeist. The top people search is as follows 1. justin bieber 2. jack neo 3. jang geun suk 4. katy perry 5. lee kuan yew 6. lady gaga 7. miley cyrus 8. taylor swift 9. dawn yang 10. adam lambert. From the number of celebraties on this list, it is clear that youngsters spend the most time on the web. At number 2, does this make jack neo Singaporean of the year? Singaporeans' lists came out surprising clean, same goes for Global and United States. I was expecting xxx to come out tops, but I was mistaken ( but they could have filtered that out too). The search that come closest to that was China's 兽兽门..

Sadly, most of the things I searched for did not end up on this list. So I shall make a mental list of the stuffs I searched for. 1. straits times 2. reuters 3. gothere.sg 4. hungrygowhere 5. efinancial careers 6. JobsDB 7. Job Street 8. POEMS 9. World Cup 2010 10. nus career center. Wrote this down from the top of my head, so this list might now be representative or accurate.

.. but it kind of show what's on my mind now..

market

'WikiLeaks rival plans Monday launch after internal split, founders say' - CNN Tech. So now there is a market for disclosure of secret information? So is it an oligopoly now. Watch out for the opening of ...

OpenLeak.org.

splielng is irrleenvat

I had read about this post from the big picture a while back off another website. The picture below demonstrated the ability of the brain to decipher words that are spelled wrongly (as long as the first and last letters are kept). What they did not mention is that this works only when the jumbled-up words are placed in a sentence. If you have seen 'splieling' being used alone, would you have guessed that it stood for 'spelling'?

"try it."-cj

I remember making a lot of orthographic errors when I did up PowerPoint slides in french. With the exception of 1 or 2 misplaced letters, I was sure I got the rest of the word right. However, those smart people simply refused to recognize the word. To them, their language is their pride.

Any misspelling is a abhorable.

profile pic

All you facebook user would have noticed the new user profile layout. I have yet to change to the new layout as I still prefer the old one. TechCrunch shows how with a little bit of creativity you can spruce up your profile page.

"pretty cool huh."-cj

he is an associate director. o.O

wrap up

Let's see how do I go about this last leg of the graduate program. To file for graduation you have to first fulfill the minimum requirements (M.Eng Graduation Requirements).

1. Take and pass at least 4 modules (non-English modules), or its equivalent of 16 modular credits (MCs). 1 of the 4 modules may be at EE4000 level. Others are at EE5000/EE6000, or equivalent
2. Obtain CAP ≥ 3.0 (average grade ≥B-), based on best 4 modules (or 16 MCs)
3. Obtain grade S (Satisfactory) for Graduate Seminars module (Attend at least 12 seminars during candidature, present at least 2 seminars on research carried out during candidature). To check your Graduate Seminar Module enquiry.
4. Pass the M.Eng thesis. Follow the procedure for Thesis submission.Once this is done, the registrar will liaise with you for graduation.
   
5. Obtain minimum grade C in the Graduate English Course (Intermediate Level).
6. No need to file for graduation on CORS
   
7. Any additional stuffs/ requirements will be updated later when I encounter them.
   

alright. let's do this.

comfortable among books

It was an early morning on Sunday. The library was quiet and there were few people in the library. Even though, I had a book in my hand, I was not there to read. Rather, I was looking for a quiet place where no one knew me and where there was no need to make small talks. That morning I woke up feeling amazing peaceful and at ease. Perhaps the science of diffusion applies to ambiance and mood too, the library's contained stillness felt like it was able to keep the peace in me for a very long time. It was an appropriate place to spend the morning. I was there for two hours, but I did not get past page 5 of the book. I was enjoying the moment. This moment I got from examining my life and future. My future is still mired in uncertainties, but it felt good to have more information and to know more things. Knowledge empowers and makes people comfortable as such. Having this revelation in the library, where knowledge is kept, does seems a little like living in a cliche.

I only I can smuggle a cup of coffee into the library, then, the moment would have been perfect.

I slept well last night.

waffles

"edible keyboard"-cj

cute.

morning

My biological clock is one thing that I hope will screw up, but has never screwed up before. No matter what time I sleep, I will be awake before 8am the next day. How ironic it is to tell people I'm feeling tired now, right after I woke up.

i'm a morning person.

x'mas gift

For all of you who have not decided what gift to get for your kids. Here is one piece of good advice "Giving stocks to children can be a better gift than just toys". Though depending on what you buy, the gift will be a little on the steep side as oppose to a barbie doll or wii. But you have to take on the risk of sounding like a screw up dad. Imagine if I were to tell my kids, "No sweetie, the barbie doll will depreciate with time. So I have gotten you ETF shares, you will learn to love the time value of money. (: " Might work. Because kids are much easier to cajole. But on Valentine, please do not ever try to say...

"No honey, I didn't get you that diamond ring, I have gotten u some ETF shares instead."

catch all

Nowadays, when I see a position that I am interested in, I would instinctively look out for the following phrases 'Exceptional candidates with different profiles and no relevant work experience will be considered' or 'less experienced candidates with exceptional academic records are also invited to apply'. Then I tell myself, "Maybe. Just maybe I might be the exceptional candidate." A bold assumption on my part. The HR, on the other hand, wants to make sure that good potential candidates do not fall through their net. Put two and two together it is to make sure that I do not fall through their net.

yea. heh.

odds are against me, but i prepared my CV and sent it out anyway.

one cool thing a day

Borrowed these from One Cool Thing a Day. Pretty amusing do I thought I will share them. No matter how many times I have seen the chicken and egg picture, I still liked it on the most.

cool huh.

x'mas comes early

I will always ask for books and this year is no exception. If gifts come with them a set of expectations for the receiver, then this book really sets the standards. During working hours, I shall command the latest state of the art high frequency technology. Then after office hours, I shall rule the kitchen and whip out a spread of culinary delights with the help of this "Golden Book of Cooking". I cannot even pronounce some of the dishes inside. How do you pronounce zucchini? I will definitely put this book to use and may ask to use one of your kitchens. So prepare your kitchen as I whip up a storm! (boy, this sounds really bad)

"You will find more than 200 never-fail recipes for
everything from sauces to desserts for all your favourite
and classic dishes from around the world."-cj

let's see.. the desserts look easy..

reviewer

Here is an extract of an email I got yesterday:-
"Dear Mr.

I would be grateful if you would kindly agree to act as a reviewer for this paper. The abstract appears at the end of this letter, along with the names of the authors...

... I realise that our expert reviewers greatly contribute to the high standards of the Journal, and I thank you for your present and/or future participation...

... Thank you for evaluating this manuscript. "

I have joined the ranks of expert reviewers o.O

philo jokes

Web surfing brought me to Bits of Wisdom. Sometimes the comments left by people are funnier than the original entries/ posts. Here's one example, but you have to read this original post to understand the comments.

"Doesn’t anyone else get sick of these lame, false platitudes?" - Chris

"i don’t think so chris! sometimes you just need those lame platitudes!!!" - sally

"What false platitudes? - Bob

"Bob, best recursive comment ever!!!!" - Dani

"What recursive comment?" - Josh

Seriously, the 4th and 5th comments took the punch away..

tuesday with me

One cannot imagine how many dinners I have scheduled for today - 3. It is either everyone wants to spend Tuesday with me or everyone in my universe is free on Tuesday. So let's see how did it happened?

Bored as I am now, I model this as a stochastic processes. We can use it to calculate the probability of social dinner clashing on the same day. Let's see how this goes. [Disclaimer: This is done in the name of fun. Appreciate my typing out of the equations and not try to rigorously examine the substance of it.]First, I think its reasonable to assume that the probability of being called for dinner follows a Non Homogeneous Poisson Processs.
Lambda is the rate parameter which is a function of time. Let's use an increasing exponential function to model it, since I tend to get called out for dinner more often over the weekends.
To be more precise, we should actually account for festivities and exams. But for simplicity, let's assume each week is the same (i.e. I get the same number of calls for dinner during exam and during X'mas). Solving, probability of being called for Tuesday should be something like that:-
Now that I have arrived here, I do not see any purpose of doing all these. To get reasonable estimates for A and alpha, I would need the historical data to find out the average number of calls for dinner I get on each day over the past few years. I cannot estimate the probability now..zzz.. I seriously wonder if this is what researchers do for fun?

have to cancel one and prepare to have dinner twice.

last min

I haven't bought the gift for the x'mas exchange. It's not tomorrow night right? eh? eh.. eh!

crap..

area cleaning

TGIFriday's has this distinctive decor made up of organized clusters of everything old and American that accentuate their ambiance. After 8 man hours of cleaning, my room spots similar piles of organized clusters of everything old and useless. Unfortunately, they give off totally different vibes as TGIF's, so my room's not as cool as I would like it to be.

Ah yes, the clusters. Much as I would like to throw them out immediately before they accumulate, they are here to stay for a while. Area cleaning in my household follows the same kind of chain of command you see in public sectors. There are lots of bureaucratic red tapes and layers of approvals. Upper echelons have thwarted several of my attempts to clear my room. You cannot just throw away item X just because they are useless and have not served any purpose for the past year. Trust me, it is easier to write a proposal to justify write downs of inventories or dispose fully depreciated assets in a company than to throw away a stationary holder in my house. If only I can get them on board with the idea of throwing away fully depreciated objects or things with neither resale value nor future economic value, things would be much easier. For now, I would have to keep jumping over these clusters until they can be canned.

cleaning trivials: > 50% of the pens I tested today do not work.

found it

This has been in my head for a while.

飛輪海 - 繼續愛

ta da

After a self declared black out period, I am back. The past week called for undivided attention towards studying. Now that I am free, I need to get my hands dirty. I shall first clean my room, sort out my mails, balance my accounts and throw away all the n'importe quoi stuffs in my room.

ah. don't you love the smell of freedom..

watch this space